Weird and Wonderful Five Nights at Freddy’s Merch (Self-Inflicted #Ad)

Hey guys! Today we’re going to be trying something a little different. Today, we’re going to be taking a look at some of the weird and/or wonderful Five Night’s at Freddy’s Stuff that I’ve found out there. This isn’t the weirdest or, you know, most wonderful, by any means, but it’s an interesting little collection of merch that you may want to at least check out if you’re a fan of the series.

With each product, I’ll give a paragraph or two of information, but that doesn’t give much room, so if anything does seem interesting, as an Affiliate I’ve provided a link to the Amazon page so that you can go check out this stuff in more detail. I assure you that everything listed here is something that I have some experience with, through work or owning such products myself, so I’m not just bullshitting you.

Okay, let’s go!

1. Five Nights at Freddy’s 25240 “Jumpscare” Game

fnaf game imageThis weird game, which Matt and Steph even played on GT Live, just had to get a mention, because of the weird infamy it’s managed to pick up. Essentially, in this game, you have to pick up small pieces of pizza, and you lose if you trigger a Freddy jumpscare. It’s the same sort of principle as Buckaroo and many other games, but it’s weirder because it’s, you know, Freddy Fazbear. We actually sell this thing in the toy store where I’ve been working and I’ve seen a good few people pick it up. It’s got its popularity. I might even check it out.

2. Five Nights at Freddy’s – Nightmare Freddy

nightmarefreddypopThis is just one example of the many FNaF Pops available. As a FNaF fan with just one FNaF Pop in my collection, I find this maddening. Now, if you collect Pops and like the games, this might seem like a pretty solid investment … or thousand. But I do wonder, why are we selling all of this stuff to children? Is FNaF, a series about child murder, really appropriate? I ask, like I’m in any way fighting it. I LIVE for FNaF merch.

3. Five Nights At Freddy’s 6.5″ Plush: Foxy

foxyplush If the Pops weren’t making the child murder friendly enough, how about a cute child murder plushie? Now that haunted animatronic is just adorable, and I’m sure your own not murdered children will love it! But, in all seriousness, I do own a couple of FNaF plushies. I have a Freddy and a Bonnie. And they are adorable and they do love them. I kind of totally want the whole set.

4. Funko Five Nights at Freddy’s Action Figure 4 Pack – Foxy, Gold Freddy, Chica, and Endoskeleton Freddy

funko4pack This Funko four pack encapsulates exactly why FNaF merch is so confusing to me. On the one hand, it’s awesome, and FNaF is awesome, and I want all of this stuff. But it’s also creepy and these games just aren’t appropriate for children. And yet children is who this stuff is marketed towards. Also, do Funko know anything about these games? Because this is such a random collection of characters to have in a set. Collectors wanna catch ’em all anyway, guys. You don’t need to drive us mad, too.

Bonus: Five Nights at Freddy’s

fnag gameHow could I resist? At the time of writing this, the original game costs £1.80 on Amazon, so if you’ve not joined the jumscare fandom yet, why not hop in? I need more people to sit with me in this pit of lore. It’s amazing how many people have yet to play this game, because I love and recommend this series.

As I said, this is a self-inflicted ad. I’m talking about this stuff because I like it and/or find it interesting, and because I want to. And as always, thank you guys so much for reading. I’ll get the next Sunday Review out to you all ASAP. I hope you found this FNaF merch … FNaFfy.


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